Can your pet judge your date?

Dating can be lots of things - sometimes it’s exciting, sometimes it’s tough, and a lot of the time, we’re a bit lost. Are they the right match for us? Was that date fun, or am I just lying to myself? Do I want to see them again? Occasionally, we just need some outside perspective, and who better than the one who knows us best: our tailmate. Sometimes, our pets are excellent judges of character, but can they actually judge your date? Is there any truth to the idea that cats and dogs can sense “bad people”? Here, we discuss the science behind how pets “sense” people, signs they aren’t a fan of your date, and why it may just be your pet reflecting your vibe rather than your date’s. The science behind how pets “sense” people Micro-expressions Pets are masters at noticing body language , so they can pick up small things we miss, like micro-expressions and changes in posture. Hormone detection: adrenaline, cortisol and oxytocin Oxytocin, cortisol and adrenaline are hormones that pets, especially dogs, are very attuned to, and they can all spike during a date. While there’s no evidence they can actually smell these hormones, dogs can sniff out the chemical and behavioural changes that occur in our body in response to them, like sweat. Oxytocin is sometimes referred to as the “cuddle hormone”, which triggers when we’re relaxed and bonding with someone. Pets can pick up on this, so when we’re having a nice, relaxed time with someone, this signals to our pets that we’re all “safe”. Conversely, adrenaline has the opposite effect. When this spikes, we’re typically stressed and have a lot of cortisol in our bodies, too. When a pet detects these, it can put them on edge, leading to negative reactions to your date. Now, this isn’t a personal judgement of your date by your pet. After all, they might just be feeling nervous. So, if your date’s system is running high in adrenaline and cortisol, a dog’s instincts start shouting “threat!”, while oxytocin signals “chill out”. VOCs (Volatile Organic Compounds) Smells are a major part of a pet’s world, especially dogs, so it isn’t always the case of them catching a “vibe” - often, they’re following their nose, and a negative reaction may be due to the presence of Volatile Organic Compounds (VOCs). These can happen from small changes, like a date wearing a certain perfume or having a particular type of fabric softener, so sometimes, your pet is simply sensing a change in smells, not necessarily sensing anything about your date and their personality. Signs your tailmate isn’t a fan of your new boo Usually, your pet will display negative body language. This is a little different between cats and dogs. If your cat’s not a fan, they’ll typically: And if your dog is giving you the “are you sure?” energy, they’ll: Dog sense vs. cat wisdom: how they read your date We’ve talked about pets generally in this article, but cats and dogs may assess people differently. This is due to the ways they socialise, as well as their general approach to life. Whether canine or feline, it's also worth noting that your pet’s personality will play a big part in how well they respond to your date. For example, a friendly and open pet versus one that is shy and anxious. How cats read people How dogs sense people Key differences The Mirror Effect: why your pet isn’t always judging your date (they’re actually reading you) There is another explanation for your pet’s cold shoulder towards your date: they’re just copying you! Pets have something called the “Mirror Effect” where they’ll mimic the behaviour, emotions, and stress levels of their pet parents. This means, if you aren’t feeling good about your date, your pet won’t, either. There are multiple layers to this: Studies have shown that dogs can mirror the stress levels of their pet parents, so it makes sense that if you aren’t having the best time, your pet won’t, either. Can pet ownership become a dealbreaker? It depends. For us, we wouldn’t imagine being with someone who wasn’t as pet-obsessed as we are; we’re pet parents, after all, and our tailmates are a part of our family. But really, if you’re fond of your partner, it’s likely they and your tailmate just need a bit of time. Unless there are deeper issues at play, like incompatibility or allergies (which may be possible to manage), it might just be a case of them getting used to each other. Once your pet starts building up some positive experiences and interactions with your date (treats and toys help!) they’ll usually come around. And, who knows, with time, your tailmate may prefer them over you! Just kidding: we know that’s an impossibility. FAQs about pets and dating Can cats and dogs sense "bad people"? Can cats and dogs really sense “bad people”? Well, not really - as we’ve mentioned above, they can’t detect things on a moral level, but instead pick up on subtle hints like body language and smells to detect feelings like anxiety and stress. My dog loves everyone except the person I’m dating. Is this a red flag? We wouldn’t read too much into it, especially if you and your close ones get along with the person you’re dating. It’s more likely something has rubbed your tailmate the wrong way, like a specific event, and they’ll both just need some time. Can dogs sense if someone is a 'narcissist' or a 'bad person'? So, can dogs act as a biological lie detector? Well, no - they lack any deeper insights into morals and psychology compared to us. But they can detect something called incongruence, which is when someone is acting in a way that’s opposite of how they’re feeling. For example, if someone is acting nice, calm, and friendly, but they’re exhibiting signs of psychological stress (like cortisol), a dog can pick up on this contradiction. My cat hides every time my partner comes over. Should I be worried? Some people just aren’t cat people, are they? And yes: we don’t trust them either... Jokes aside, a cat hiding from someone doesn’t always mean they dislike them specifically. Sometimes, a date is louder than you, which triggers a cat’s anxiety. At other times, a cat can act territorial while they get used to a new person in their home. Is it normal for a dog to be 'jealous' of a new date? Dogs can get jealous ( we’ve covered this in detail before ), but it's more likely they’re acting protective and resource guarding instead. We’re sure that with a bit of time and positive reinforcement , things will get better.

Can your pet judge your date?

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