Pets vs partners: Five telltale signs you like your pet more than your partner

Have you ever devoted full focus to your pet’s latest belly rub as your partner tried to tell you something or other about their new promotion?

Are you scheduling date nights around your pet’s feeding and training schedules? Have you ever momentarily forgotten there was another human in the house? What does your pet vs partner priority look like?

It might just be the case that your pet is your #1 love - much to the chagrin of the person you’re sharing your life with, but that's just a part of the pet parent lifestyle, isn't it?

But how do you know if this applies to you? Here are five signs that your furry friend comes first in your affections.

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Five signs you like your pet more than your partner

1. They get fed before you and your partner (and get way more treats)

Have you ever found yourself meticulously preparing a gourmet feast for your furry friend while you and your partner planned another round of microwave magic? Is your pet’s high-end kibble or fresh tuna the highest-quality food in your home?

It's not just about timing—i.e., feeding your pet before your partner (or yourself). It’s also about making sure they’re dining in style and luxury, even as you and your significant other veg out with half-frozen cuisine while you’re binge-watching Netflix.

And this only accounts for mealtime; your pet is undoubtedly receiving the treat jackpot daily — maybe the homemade kind. From training nibbles to those "just because you're adorable" snacks, your pet is truly living the dream.

Your other half, not so much.

2. You take more pictures of your pet than your partner

Smartphones reign supreme. Unfortunately, your pet doesn’t have the right body parts to snap selfies.

Since your furry friend can’t take their own glamour shots, it’s on you to pick up their photographic slack—over and over and over.

As you scroll through your photo library, you might notice a curious trend: your four-legged pal is hogging the limelight, outnumbering the snaps of your sweetheart by a margin of 100-1.

It’s understandable. From their zany zoomies to those "I'm-too-cute-for-words" naps, pets turn even the most mundane moments into photo-ops. Your partner might be cute, too, but they may not be as photogenic as your furry friend. Whoever could be?

Here’s a fun game: tally up the ratio of pet snapshots to partner pictures and see which one comes out on top. In shots with both the pet and partner present, the tiebreaker goes to the pet.

If your pet finishes ahead on points, that’ll tell you everything you need to know.

3. You have nicknames for your pet, but not your partner

You know how you call your pet by about a dozen nicknames, ranging from Princess to Emperor-Sniffs-a-Lot? It’s almost as if you’ve got a special name for all their moods and mischief modes.

What's truly amazing is watching your tailmate's nicknames evolve. These pet names weave stories and capture memories; a new one might pop up after a particularly playful afternoon or an adorable new habit.

Now think about what you call your partner. We’ll grant you “sweetie” or “babe,” but does it just kind of end there? The times you shout “hey” from across the room don’t count.

Don’t be surprised if your furry friend memorizes all of your nicknames for them. Or maybe their ears are simply perking up no matter what you say—they’re the centre of your world after all, and they probably think you’re addressing them all the time.

And if your pet trots over to you looking for attention even when you say “sweetie,” “babe,” or “hey,” fair enough, your partner can wait.

4. You greet your pet first when you walk through the door

There's something timelessly heartwarming about being greeted by an exuberant critter when you return home. That moment when you step through the door and your pet greets you like you're the best thing since kibble? Pure magic.

For many pet parents, this rapturous welcome beats your significant other’s feeble “hi, how was your day?”

Sorry, partner—I gotta spout baby talk at Fluffy, then we’ll talk.

Wrapped up in these everyday hellos is something deeply special—a pure, uncomplicated connection. It's a reminder that, amid the hustle and bustle of human life, there's incredible warmth in the straightforward love and loyalty of our pets.

The human dialogue can wait.

5. You can't stop talking about your pet

"Oh, you climbed Mount Everest? Cool, cool... But did I tell you about the time my cat, Dave, scaled the kitchen cabinets to reach his catnip?” — You, probably.

Let's be honest: your pet is pretty much the star of the show, and you're their number one fan. Whether you’re boasting about the latest trick they've mastered (or the one they mastered five years ago), or you’re simply melting over how cute your dog looks while they’re sleeping, you can make these stories last a lifetime.

And to your partner, it probably seems like you’re doing just that.

Not just in person, either. Your social media is likely a digital shrine to your pet—a deluge of snapshots, videos, and anecdotes celebrating their furry existence. There’s no shame in that; it's your way of letting the world know just how awesome your pet is and how unimportant everyone else is by comparison.

Pets vs Partners - what does the science say?

Some studies have looked into why we can have such strong bonds with our pets - sometimes at the expense of our partners - and the findings show there are real, sciencey reasons why we’re so tailmate-obsessed!

One major study showed that gazing at our pets increased the concentration of oxytocin in both humans and pets. Oxytocin is the "bonding hormone", meaning mutual gazing and time with our pets increases affection and trust.

Another study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychologyfound that people felt less stress - like high blood pressure and high heart rates - when doing a strenuous task in front of a pet rather than a person. This may explain why we feel safer with our pets, too.

Pets vs Partners statistics - what does the data say?

Well, the data certainly tells a story. A recent survey we ran found that 63% of pet parents said they admitted (even jokingly) that they loved their pet more than their partner, with 20% saying they actually meant it.

Now, we wouldn’t read too much into this, as people joke around all the time, but it does reveal something: our tailmates are important to us, and when they’re a part of the family, they feel like family, too.

Does my pet love me back?

It’s fair to ask: how do you know if a cat loves you? Or a dog?

Keep in mind that pets have their own unique ways of showing love and affection. Dogs may demonstrate their love through wagging tails, excited barks, and eager kisses, while cats might express affection through purring or nuzzling. Pets often have their own unique love languages.

These behaviours signal trust and comfort, showing you that your pet not only recognises you as their caregiver but also as a source of love and safety. Observing your pet's behaviour and recognising these signs of affection can reassure you that they love you as much as you love them—if that’s even possible.

Is my love for my pet impacting my dating life?

Now that’s a more complicated question. Relationships, jealousy and pets is a nuanced topic.

We conducted a survey in 2024 of more than 1,000 dog owners and found that your four-legged friend might just be your best wingman, especially online. 34% of singles admitted that a dog in someone’s profile picture boosted their attractiveness.

But it's not all wagging tails; while 86% feel their dog positively spices up their dating life, the path to romance isn't free of hurdles. Some find their pet's jealousy a tricky obstacle, with 31% of dog owners noticing their furry friend gets a bit envious of their dates. (Alas, a lifetime of treating your pet like the centre of the universe can do that).

For those in relationships, if your human companion has tolerated second-place status for this long, odds are there’s no amount of furry favouritism that could possibly tear them away from you. For lots of pet parents, a partner who is jealous of your cat or dog is normal.

The bottom line: finding someone who shares or respects your affection for your pet can lead to a more harmonious relationship. Bonus points if they can embrace second-fiddle status with grace. Worst-case scenario: you can build a miniature wooden house in the backyard.

And your partner can live in it.

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Pets vs Partners: Frequently Asked Questions

Is it a red flag if my partner is jealous of my pet?

We wouldn't say so. A partner jealous of your dog or cat is common, and pet jealousy impacts lots of couples. Typically, jealousy indicates it's a pet-centred relationship, and your human-animal bond may be causing emotional problems for your partner.

Open communication about boundaries usually helps resolve this, and you'll be a pair of pet parents before you know it.

Why do I feel 'less judged' with my dog than my partner?

This is to do with oxytocin and pet ownership. Pet and parent relationships tend to be simpler and lack conflict, which leads to a less complex connection, which triggers more consistent oxytocin.

Oxytocin is responsible for attachment, bonding and trust, so it makes sense why you’d feel less judged and safer around your pet.

How do I balance pet ownership and a new relationship?

It’s simply about getting them involved in your and your pet’s routine. Involve them on walks, feeding time, training, events and even the “boring” stuff like routine vet visits. That way, your pet will get used to them and vice-versa.

We’re sure if you like them, your pet will like them too - that way, it becomes less “pet vs partner”, and more “us”.

My boyfriend/girlfriend wants the dog to sleep in a different room. What do I do?

This is just about clear communication and understanding your partner’s reason. We’ve discussed whether your pet should sleep in your bed or bedroom before, but if a partner has an issue with it, then it’s time to find out why.

Some steps to take include:

• Discussing the “why” - Is it allergies, sleep disturbances, cleanliness or something else?

• Use positive reinforcement training - Positive reinforcement can help your pet learn new habits, like sleeping outside the bedroom. Never use negative reinforcement.

• Maintain consistency - Pets thrive on consistency, so whatever you decide after discussing things with your partner, try to stick with it.

• Compromise - The important thing with any relationship - including the one we have with our pets - is compromise, so consider options where all parties can be happy.

• Bonding - Encourage your partner to bond with your pet, like feeding them or playing, which may improve things.